When did porn become unsexy?

I looked at my past blog posts and have noticed that there's actually not much about sex in here. 

It seems that since my leaving porn, it (porn) does not excite me. It's like I know too much. There's the beautiful fantasy that is Pornography. The glossy Photoshop pages where everything is right and nothing is real. The videos with the O-so-beautiful lighting. The girls with their fake hair, fake boobs, fake lips, fake eyelashes, too much makeup, platform shoes, tanning bed skin. Its all so fucking beautiful! It's sexy. It's alluring. It's everything I love about women. Its one of the reasons I love being a woman. But the reality... Oh the reality... is not nearly as sexy as the fantasy or final product. If only men knew what it took to be that beautiful. And to work so hard just for some stupid person to complain about someone's cellulite or someone being too tall, or short or not busty enough or too busty... I mean, the body image issues that lead to eating disorders, the drugs... the plastic surgery. The hours upon hours spent at the gym, obsessing over what to or not to eat... Talking about enemas, and gonorrhea, and fucking people in the ass or fucking 10 strange guys at the same time... talking about this ALL the time.. just is uninspiring. It's like porn has become un sexy to me. Watching couples kiss, that is sexy.

It's as if the lines between sexy and masturbatory have become blurred. It's sexy when a woman runs her fingers through her mans hair and they go in to kiss and you can feel the lust and adoration entangle them. It's masturbatory for me to watch a girl get fucked in the ass because of the paycheck at the end of the scene. I like hookers. They're fucking hot and great to bring home for some fun time. But the idea is more masturbatory than sexy. Even down to the S&M that I participated in. On camera S&M was more intense and stuff i wouldn't do with my lover. You can't capture the beauty of the sensuousness of S&M while filming someone be totally degraded. Film takes away... or rather, it's not what the fans want. If the fans would rather pay millions to see a girl get fucked in the ass while she's crying than being made love to in the ass, that is what will be filmed. But people also learn from porn... so you've got people paying for masturbation tools while others are trying to figure out what sex is about. both parties see a girl getting slapped in the face. The older person knows that most girls don't want that, but they like seeing it anyway. The younger person who's learning about sex thinks... that's what girls secretly want AND at the same time a young girl watching probably thinks that's what girls are supposed to like and let guys do that to her. 

THE BEST example of sexuality gone out of whack is the Robin Williams movie "Worlds Greatest Dad". Directed by Bobcat Goldthwait. Its a DARRRRRK f'n Comedy. Really dark... really dry... Well done. The point is the kid is obsessed with Porn and you see the difference in how he interacts with people vs his peers who don't. 

END RANT.

PS: I'm still a Perv... I just need some time & distance away from the IN YOUR FACE stuff to appreciate it again.